By the time you read this, I’ll be long gone. There’s no point in calling, I’ve blocked your calls. There’s no point in writing, I’ve changed my address. You can never have me back. You’ve changed, I’ve changed…we are no longer working towards the same goals.
I stayed for as long as I did because I remained hopeful that we would eventually come back together. I stayed for as long as I did because I thought you wanted me. I believed that you cared about me and what I thought. I thought you valued my needs.
I thought there was a mutual benefit, a mutual respect. I see now that you are the only one who gained from this relationship. You wanted the idea of me, but only when it was convenient… when you needed something. Maybe I am being selfish, but I will no longer allow you take advantage of me. I am a free thinker, I am independent, and guess what? I AM DONE!
So, you think that is a typical “Dear John” letter right? Well, it’s not. This is my “Dear Republican Party” Letter. You know the old saying, “If you’re young and not a Democrat, you have no heart. And, if you’re old and not a Republican, you have no brain.” I now know that is the dumbest statement ever. Why? Because the two shouldn’t be mutually exclusive.
Up until the 2002 election cycle, I had always considered myself a Republican. It had been my dream to one-day work in politics, because it was…it is…my greatest passion. Being completely submerged as a fundraiser in that year’s Congressional race, gave me the chance to live that dream… at least that’s what I thought at the time. What it actually did was initiate the disintegration of my loyalty to the Republican party. After that experience, I said I would never work in politics again. It killed my passion, or at least it did for a while.
I soon began to realize that it wasn’t me, it was them. I had begun to realize that the issues were just empty talking points, something that was used to get votes. It’s like the guy who constantly cheats on you. He says, “I love you, I love you, you’re the only one for me.” And then you find the text message to the “other woman” exclaiming the same thing. But you fall for his load of crap because you don’t see anything better out there, and you’re blindly optimistic that “next time” will be different.
Before this revelation, I was young and blinded by ideology. I am now fully immersed in adulthood. I am “adulting” every damn day; every second of every damn day. I have 2 children whom I homeschool, and I have a husband who is only a couple of years away from retiring from the military. We are so “adulting!” I’m not blinded by charm anymore. The Knight-in-Shining Armor doesn’t impress me unless he has bumps, bruises, scrapes, and has flung the white horse over his shoulder.
Over the last several years, I tried to keep my heels dug deep. I tried so hard to find a reason to stick it out. I turned over every rock, looked in every nook and cranny to find some redeeming quality to keep me from walking away. But, it’s just not there anymore. Before that, I was passionate about politics, but I wasn’t truly educated on the issues. Now I am.
Taxes, education, spending, foreign policy, Constitutional rights; these issues are more important than party ideology; it is MY ideology.
The past few years have been eye-opening; I am not a Republican, at least not when it comes to the typical conservative position on the big issues and not even after examining in greater depth their position on broader issues. I have found them to be very pro big-government fiscally and way too concerned with legislating morality.
They say they want smaller government, but the amount of money they spend says otherwise. They say they want to decrease taxes, but they never work towards a meaningful reduction, almost certainly due to the fact that they want to keep the over-bloated government propped up. Republicans say they care about education, but they continue to support policy that is more focused on testing than educating and more focused on the needs of the publishing companies than on the consumer, the children.
Republicans are hawkish on foreign policy and military issues, but their foresight is anything but hawk-like. Eager to promote nation-building, eager to force countries into becoming democracies, regardless of the outcome. They are less eager to understand the long-term cost. It’s just a means-to-an-end, where the end is unknown.
The Republican Party took me for granted. They don’t listen. They take and they take and they take, and give nothing in return. It’s a one-sided relationship and I’m exhausted, burnt out, and have nothing left to give them. I am way too good for them, and my family and the future of this country is way too important. I’m breaking up and I’m never coming back. They had their chance. They had innumerable chances; every election, every policy debate.
I am independent and free. Committed to no party and no candidate. I can vote how I want, for whom I want, whenever I want. Or, I have the right to say no. I make my own decisions and I will not be forced to do their dirty work anymore. I am only committed to MY ideology, and will tow the party line no more.
And, if the Libertarian Party finds an attractive candidate, I WILL vote for that candidate. One thing is for certain… #NEVERTRUMP!